Saturday, January 23, 2010

If You Don't Jump, You Will Get Pushed

I am a slow and steady wins the race kind of girl. The pedestrian tortoise to the speed of the hare. I like sure things. Vegas is not my thang. I wrote for the web for a year and a half before I had the courage to create my own blog. I often avoid things I know I will love for fear that I may fail.

I consider everyone else's feelings in a decision before I consider my own. I tip toe into the future rather than charge full speed ahead. I hate making mistakes and I've developed a personality that minimizes risk.

I almost always know in my heart of hearts what is the right next step for me long before I ever find the courage to take the first step toward it.


Hello, Karma.

Fancy seeing you here. On the edge of the next big chapter in my life. You know well by now how I feel about you. I love love love you when you're busy biting the ass of someone who I think deserves it. I'm not such a big fan of you when I'm standing on the edge of a cliff - double, triple, quadruple checking my safety gear - when you decide that this is the exact moment to give me one of your affectionate shoves. Don't you know how high up we are? I'm afraid of heights, damn you.

Could we at least, just once, give a whisper, a note, or a billboard a try? Hell, I'll even go out for coffee if you'd like. I promise I will even do the listening instead of the talking.

Stop laughing.

What do you mean you always try those things first? Funny I never seem to notice.

Okay, so what's the plan here? Since I didn't have the parachute fully packed and ready to go it looks like I'm going to have to fly. And quick. Swiftly, without a plan. Without looking down.

I'm going to have to do it afraid.


Here I go.

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